Happy Relationships - Happier at Home

In Gretchin Rubin’s book, Happier at Home, she explains that people who are happy make easier spouses and better dates.  She encourages us to find our happiness not only for ourselves but for our relationships.  She further goes on to explain that happier people usually get married and stay married more easily than unhappy people; support and companionship are important elements to a happy life. Her whole book gives examples of how to be happier every day. 

In order to create happiness in your relationships look at what you desire from your partner.  If you would like more romance, then be more romantic yourself.  Instead of waiting for your partner to fulfill your desires, start fulfilling them yourself.  I love kissing, Nate (my fiancé) so instead of waiting for him to kiss me (which he does, but of course I want more J) I kiss him.  Gretchin recommends a kiss in the morning and a kiss at night.  I’ve been practicing this and am feeling much happier in my life.  It’s a great way to start the day and end it.  It may seem unromantic to schedule these kisses but if it adds happiness to your life, then why not?

Another tip is to give gold stars.  How many of us show our appreciation to our loved one?  When he tackles a project, thank him.  Praise him in front of others.  Say “I love you!” more often.  Be helpful even when not asked.  Speak only good thing even when he is not around.  No more complaining or criticizing.  It can be easy to complain if Nate has been distant by being preoccupied with his work but it only makes me feel icky.  I’d rather speak only good things and focus on these great parts that I love so much about him.  Nate has many good qualities to focus on such as his intelligence, conversational skills, ability to have fun, good friendships, and he’s a very clean guy.  Yes, I like focusing on the positive.  You?