Thursday, July 29, 2010

Day 5: Reclaiming your power (Ford, Shadow)

     How are you a victim?  Ford says that most of us have gathered strong evidence to validate our perception that we are victims of life. Either we are victims of ourselves or of others and then we are left powerless. The only way to be rid of this victim mentality is by taking responsibility for the way our life is.  We need to let go of blaming others for the way our life is and realize that we have the choice and power to have the life we want. In any situation that you are a victim there is also a blessing in it.  Ford suggests that we look at the blessing instead of being a victim. 
     Forgiving our parents is crucial to getting out from being a victim.  When my parents got a divorce I built up my own resentment toward "happy marriages."  Could they really exist?  I would question.  My thinking was that "Why would anyone want to get married when it just ends in divorce?"  In each relationship when things were going good I would self-sabotage the relationship so I wouldn't have to get to the point of getting married and then divorced.  Whenever I got too close to someone I would begin picking fights and "ruining" the relationship.  In other words I was sticking to my story and being a victim.  The blessing in their divorce was that I didn't have to be around my parent's fighting anymore and that they were able to move forward with their lives and be happier.
    Each of our upbringings were just the right combination to teach us the lessons we needed to learn.  Ford says that, "When we have let go of our right to be victim, we will understand that we had the perfect parents who taught us the perfect lessons."   Reclaim your power by not being a victim and by taking responsibility for your reality.

    

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