Day 12: The reality of WORRY (Dyer)

     Wayne Dyer defines worry as, "being immobilized in the present as a result of things that are going or not going to happen in the future."  There isn't any amount of worry that will change anything.  Most worry is over things that you cannot control (ie. war, economy, possible illness).  When I'm around someone who is coughing or sneezing I worry I will get sick.  Most of the time I don't and even if I did it's not the end of the world.  Worrying does not bring peace, prosperity or health.  Most of the time what we worry about turns out to be less horrible in reality than in your imagination.
    I think we have all worried about flying on an airplane.  All the worry and anxiety over what could happen if the engine fails, too much turbulence, severe weather or just bad luck and the plane crashes.  To eliminate this worry I always think about how many planes fly and the low probability of them crashing; that hundreds of planes are flying right now, safely.  I have worried on a whole 7 hour flight from the U.S. to Europe only to find myself land safely.  All that worry for nothing.  I had no control over the future and I sat in an icky state of worry for 7 hours.  My only benefit is that I get to write about it in this blog now.
    Some things you might find yourself worrying about:  being on time, getting sick, being liked, looking good...Without worry you can still work on all of these things.  Worry adds nothing.  Why do we worry?  One reason is to avoid doing something we don't want to.  Wayne gives a great example.  He is away from home to write a book which is a difficult task.  Instead of writing he let's his mind worry about his daughter back at home (ie. Is she riding her bike on the street instead of the sidewalk where it's safer?)  A whole hour goes by.  He hasn't started writing a word.  He was able to avoid the daunting task of writing thus far.  In many other ways worry is an avoidance technique whether it's conscience or not.  When you worry ask yourself, "Is there anything that will ever change as a result of my worrying about it?"  Well put Mr. Dyer!
     Honestly, though, I worry about my relationships.  I worry that they won't be perfect and yet I am imperfect.  I worry that I'm not good enough or entertaining enough for others to like me, yet they do like me.  I worry that if I don't have a good job that I will be looked at as stupid and dependent yet I am still learning and I am dependent.  I worry that if I'm not skinny enough I can't be happy yet I am happy regardless of my weight.  I worry that if I don't love enough I won't be loved in return...yet I am loved even when I act unloving.  When I act out of my worry I am distressed and do the things I wish I wouldn't do.  If I don't worry then my life will be exactly the same as if I had worried minus the worrying.